提前回來了，可有些茫然、失去方向。我懷疑自己是否適合旅行，因為每次回來都會渴望回家又尋不著原本的生活軌跡。
工作已經安排了，不能停。可是思維好像留在了越南一望無際的天空和雲端。
我是誰？我從哪裡來？我在這裡做甚麼？我又能做些甚麼？
我是過客，從種滿水稻的國家回來，我在寫blog, 也沒有甚麼其它可以做，就是說些廢話，排解心中煩燥而已。
天，這麼負面，看來心情真的低落。
你到底想要甚麼？
不知道。
明早還要煮飯。
2007年7月31日 星期二
2007年7月23日 星期一
就是明天
這是身心都很累的一天。
主日學，要在32度的艷陽下扮演英勇奔走的母雞，抵擋麻鷹、保護十幾隻小雞；
午飯時和小妹妹的母親談了話，簽署了文件，在離開前把她安置在了姊妹屋；
下午青年人小組HIP HOP JAZZ舞蹈班開課了，學生卻離奇地少，學費也尚未有著落；
小維想來屯門幫忙，我和林玲討論卻承受了一場八號風球，名為「你總是不給別人選擇」；
要去愛爾蘭流浪的朋友一句話也沒留下就上了飛機，良心被洪水沖走了；
想了很久該同亞開怎樣開口，想到上次的毫無默契，我聰明地發了短信，結果還是沒能避過要在電話裡討論的命運；
收了線，還未從沮喪的浪潮裡尋回自己，八號風球和超人一樣強戰回歸了，這次林玲的風球名為「你不負責任」。
－
可是今天是比任何時候都感到感恩的一天。
32度的艷陽下，我看到翠綠的樹葉和藍天白雲，想到有人說上帝創造的每一樣東西，當中都有意思。樹葉制造空氣，雲層帶來淡水；我知道我的生命也有意思，所以感恩。
凱琳抱著小熊維尼跟著Anne入屋了，Ellen和亞茹晚上去了探望她的媽媽，上帝的工作開始展開，他會一點一點修補。我會繼續禱告，也知道終會見到生命改變，所以感恩。
因為人太少，我也變身來學跳舞，拉筋的時候痛得呲牙咧嘴，身邊的年青人早已鬼哭狼嚎，我暗自稱讚自己尚算忍耐。忽然想起耶穌在十字架上受過的痛，怎能不感恩？
雖然被林玲冰山一般寒冷、嚴峻的語氣嚇倒，我還是保持了春風一般和沐的口吻；收線時她已經回復室內溫度。感恩，上帝，我終於學會了面對批評不卑不亢，溫柔、和平的果子已經流淌在我的血液！哈哈！
離開了的人總會重逢，離別是為了更好地預備；因為神，對此我很有經驗，充滿信心和感恩。
亞開的聲音好像還在耳邊，堅強如你，也會覺得痛和累嗎？感謝上帝，我知道我還有很多可以做，我知道該如何為你們禱告。還有，上帝說，『你們要休息，要知道我是神。』 真好。
所有的溝通問題都讓我想念Echo Tsang, 我們就快見面了！真好！為甚麼我們從不會有爭拗？是你太溫柔、還是我太和平？是我們太有默契、還是總能彼此包容？無論哪個答案都指向同一個結論，我們都懂得愛，而我們愛，是因為他先愛了我們。值得感恩。
（林玲，我也知道你愛我，而且還用愛心說了誠實話。謝謝。）
－
套用小丸子爺爺的著名內心俳句，
「就是明天 應該會發生什麼好事情吧。」
-
2007年7月20日 星期五
Need Your Prayer
Our first batch of Vietnam team left for Ho Chi Minh on 16 July. Although there had been problems with VISA at the airport and one of them had to stay in Hong Kong, all other members arrived in Ho Chi Minh as scheduled and have started their work there.
－
Last night we received a message from the team that one of the members, Ah Lee, was robbed outside a restaurant by some motorcyclists and lost his bag with all the ID documents and passport. In a way, accidents like this have been expected as every time when a team goes for a mission trip, attacks from Satan seem to follow. On the other hand, it is worrying that the team may be in chao and children might have been terrified. That is why we need your prayers badly for God's protection and provision.
-
Right now the team is busy seeking assistance from local police and Chinese Embassy for issuing new documents. However, if it's going to take too long, they might not be able to go to the next city (Ha Noi) in time to pick up us, the second team of 4 girls, at the airport.
-
Please pray continuously for our safety as we are travelling to 4 different cities and visiting local orphanages, leprocy centres and concentration camps. The means of transport will be either bus or train. Our next two destinations are Haiphong and Mong Cai, where we'll take a bus to go across the border to China, then all the way back to Shenzhen. We are travelling with 2 families with 4 kids aged below 10, who are particularly vulnerable to illnesses like flu, diarrhea and dengue fever. Please pray for our health and hygiene conditions.
-
2007年7月19日 星期四
Our Limericks
By Echo:
-
There was a young girl from Wan Chai
who never ceased to sigh.
She murmured, 'So sad!'
and grumbled, 'Too bad!'
That difficult young girl from Wan Chai.
-
There was an old man from Mongkok
who had to work around the clock.
He wore torn jeans
and collected old tins
That lonely old man from Mongkok.
-
By Carolyn and Olivia:
-
There was an old snake from Tsing Yi
that claimed it had been to the sea.
It faintly slithered
and dizzily quivered.
That sickly old snake from Tsing Yi.
-
There was a stray cat from Mei Foo
who always slept next to the loo.
It lost its smell
and could not tell.
That stinky stray cat from Mei Foo.
-
There was a caged bird from Kowloon
who wished to fly like a balloon.
He dreamed of the sea
and longed to be free.
That pathetic caged bird from Kowloon.
-
There was a young boy from Shek O
who always drove his own limo.
He had no license
and got no patience.
That reckless young boy of Shek O.
-
2007年7月18日 星期三
My Haiku
-
HK flag flying
PRC flag waving
The show never ends
-
Turning left and right
Going up and down still
No MTR exit
-
Waiting for a girl
In the tickling summer heat
The sight of her soothes
-
Jack and Jill
In their grey school uniform
Hand in hand
-
-
PRC flag waving
The show never ends
-
Turning left and right
Going up and down still
No MTR exit
-
Waiting for a girl
In the tickling summer heat
The sight of her soothes
-
Jack and Jill
In their grey school uniform
Hand in hand
-
-
The cat is alone
Purring in the moonlight
A silent home
-
Birds flying
Above the empty playground
School break
-
Raindrops falling
On a leafless tree
Bitter spring dew
-
Clean, clear, cool
Kiss the clouds
At the Peak
-
Purring in the moonlight
A silent home
-
Birds flying
Above the empty playground
School break
-
Raindrops falling
On a leafless tree
Bitter spring dew
-
Clean, clear, cool
Kiss the clouds
At the Peak
-
2007年7月15日 星期日
思的碎片
愛看天上的雲彩，想像天父的手曾在透明畫布上拂過，還有天上的家園該有多美好
－
心有多大，世界就多大
心在哪裡，世界就在那裡
－
昨天從下午六時到早上六時，她又不見了，在城市的哪個角落呢？快樂嗎？
想念妹妹咿咿呀呀童稚的聲音嗎？記起了媽媽的眼睛和湧出的眼淚嗎？
是感覺死掉了？還是連接了錯誤的終端？
Feel - Think - Do. 思考就那麼痛苦嗎？
生命充滿風暴，你能逃避到幾時又能落腳在哪處呢？
－
這首歌唱出了你的心聲吧？
Not Ready To Make Nice
-
Forgive - sounds good
Forget - I'm not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I'm still waiting
-
I'm not ready to make nice
I'm not ready to back down
I'm still mad as hell and
I don't have time to go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
'Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is you think I should
-
肚餓的時候，我們甚麼也放進嘴裡；
心裡苦澀的人，覺得其它味道都是甜的、都帶來想像中的倚靠和能量。
到底該吃甚麼？又該倚靠誰？
－
耶穌對他們說，我就是生命的糧，到我這裏來的，必永遠不餓；信我的，必永遠不渴。
人活著，乃是靠神口裡所出的一切話。
復活的他還說，我已經戰勝這個世界。
所以，你的生命不是建立在當年父母的悲哀和背叛上，從人而來的罪在耶穌裡有醫治，有釋放，有救贖。
你可以不必活在以往的陰影裡。
孩子，回頭吧，光就在這個方向。
－
昨晚，我和小維將床墊拖出睡房
我們要在23樓開著冷氣的客廳宿營
決意不能錯過了今天的夕陽又錯過明早的曙光
2007年7月14日 星期六
任性的小孩 晴空的顏色
這個假期剛開始，讓我吃不消的除了每周15小時的summer intensive course，就是隨著仲夏而來才12、13歲孩子們的戀愛。傷痕累累又滿身是刺的他們渴望擁抱慰籍；讓人看了很心痛，卻又必須分開他們一一包紮。
－
夏天來了，走在戶外，炎夏像個淘氣、任性的小孩，不由分說撲進你的懷裡，笑著、鬧著，讓你一身汗水吃不消。
－
歸家路上，我坐在西鐵裡，陽光曬在臉頰有點痛，冷氣吹過又是陣陣寒意。一半是火燄，一半是海水。看到窗外綿延的山巒、翻滾的雲海，想到這種種矛盾，想到我認識的小孩，想到顧城這首詩。
－
我是一個任性的小孩
〔節錄〕
－
我希望 每一個時刻
都像彩色蠟筆那樣美麗
我希望
能在心愛的白紙上畫畫
畫出笨拙的自由
畫下一隻永遠不會
流淚的眼睛
一片天空
一片屬於天空的羽毛和樹葉
－
都像彩色蠟筆那樣美麗
我希望
能在心愛的白紙上畫畫
畫出笨拙的自由
畫下一隻永遠不會
流淚的眼睛
一片天空
一片屬於天空的羽毛和樹葉
－
我想畫下早晨
畫下露水
所能看見的微笑
畫下所有最年輕的
沒有痛苦的愛情
她沒有見過陰云
她的眼睛是晴空的顏色
－
畫下露水
所能看見的微笑
畫下所有最年輕的
沒有痛苦的愛情
她沒有見過陰云
她的眼睛是晴空的顏色
－
長滿淡淡的茸毛
我讓它們挨得很近
讓它們相愛
－
我是一個任性的孩子
我想塗去一切不幸
我想在大地上
畫滿窗子
讓所有習慣黑暗的眼睛
都習慣光明
－
我想塗去一切不幸
我想在大地上
畫滿窗子
讓所有習慣黑暗的眼睛
都習慣光明
－
最後 在紙角上
我還想畫下自己
畫下一隻樹熊
他坐在維多利亞深色的叢林裡
坐在安安靜靜的樹枝上
發愣
他沒有家
沒有一顆留在遠處的心
他只有 許許多多
漿果一樣的夢和很大很大的眼睛
我還想畫下自己
畫下一隻樹熊
他坐在維多利亞深色的叢林裡
坐在安安靜靜的樹枝上
發愣
他沒有家
沒有一顆留在遠處的心
他只有 許許多多
漿果一樣的夢和很大很大的眼睛
2007年7月11日 星期三
2007年7月10日 星期二
Jimmy Jet and His TV Set
STORYBOARD
Jimmy Jet lives in Happy Valley.
His father is an accountant and his mother is a pianist. They are both very successful and extremely busy.
Jimmy is 4 years old and he is raised by the Filipino maid, Marina, who is always talking on phone or reading a Filipino novel when no one is at home.
Every morning, Jimmy wakes up when his parents say goodbye to Marina.
He listens carefully when they shut the door. He moves his lips but produces no sound. He has no audience anyway.
Marina dresses up Jimmy at 8 o’clock, puts him in front of the breakfast and turns on the TV.
Then, Marina starts doing house chores and talking on phone with her friends.
Jimmy sits in the armchair and is surrounded by drinks and snacks.
Jimmy sets his eyes upon the TV screen, with the spoon in his left hand and the remote control in his right hand.
He plays with every button until he can control each and every one.
When he is full or hungry or thirsty, he hits the table and Marina comes over.
Whenever he is in need, he hits again and Marina attends to it.
The only noise heard in the room is the sound of TV and Marina talking in Filipino.
Jimmy is crying loudly as he just spills some hot milk on his leg. But no one is here as Marina has gone to the wet market to prepare for the dinner party that night.
Jimmy cries and cries. Finally, he stops and continues watching TV. From that day on, no one has ever seen Jimmy cry again.
But Jimmy screams extremely loudly when you take him away from the TV.
Once, his father says, ‘Our little boy eats so little.’
His mother says, ‘He loves watching the concert so much’.
The guests say, ‘Your little boy must grow up to be a knowledgeable person. See, he is already watching 20/20.’
Day after day, month after month, Jimmy grows bigger and fatter but is still very quiet.
In a stormy night, Jimmy's father steps on the remote control and breaks it. Jimmy cannot control the TV any more. The father covers his ears quickly and sneaks into his study. Jimmy's mother immediately puts on her headset and her fingers start dancing in the air.
Later at midnight, when Marina walks out of the bedroom, she finds Jimmy still sitting in the armchair in the dark and smiling secretly to the mirror.
The TV in the dining room is off but there is another TV in the mirror, which has replaced Jimmy’s whole body.
The next morning, the ambulance comes and takes Jimmy, the TV boy, and his parents who have gone crazy, all to the hospital.
Now the only sound heard at home is from Marina, who is still talking excitedly on phone.
His father is an accountant and his mother is a pianist. They are both very successful and extremely busy.
Jimmy is 4 years old and he is raised by the Filipino maid, Marina, who is always talking on phone or reading a Filipino novel when no one is at home.
Every morning, Jimmy wakes up when his parents say goodbye to Marina.
He listens carefully when they shut the door. He moves his lips but produces no sound. He has no audience anyway.
Marina dresses up Jimmy at 8 o’clock, puts him in front of the breakfast and turns on the TV.
Then, Marina starts doing house chores and talking on phone with her friends.
Jimmy sits in the armchair and is surrounded by drinks and snacks.
Jimmy sets his eyes upon the TV screen, with the spoon in his left hand and the remote control in his right hand.
He plays with every button until he can control each and every one.
When he is full or hungry or thirsty, he hits the table and Marina comes over.
Whenever he is in need, he hits again and Marina attends to it.
The only noise heard in the room is the sound of TV and Marina talking in Filipino.
Jimmy is crying loudly as he just spills some hot milk on his leg. But no one is here as Marina has gone to the wet market to prepare for the dinner party that night.
Jimmy cries and cries. Finally, he stops and continues watching TV. From that day on, no one has ever seen Jimmy cry again.
But Jimmy screams extremely loudly when you take him away from the TV.
Once, his father says, ‘Our little boy eats so little.’
His mother says, ‘He loves watching the concert so much’.
The guests say, ‘Your little boy must grow up to be a knowledgeable person. See, he is already watching 20/20.’
Day after day, month after month, Jimmy grows bigger and fatter but is still very quiet.
In a stormy night, Jimmy's father steps on the remote control and breaks it. Jimmy cannot control the TV any more. The father covers his ears quickly and sneaks into his study. Jimmy's mother immediately puts on her headset and her fingers start dancing in the air.
Later at midnight, when Marina walks out of the bedroom, she finds Jimmy still sitting in the armchair in the dark and smiling secretly to the mirror.
The TV in the dining room is off but there is another TV in the mirror, which has replaced Jimmy’s whole body.
The next morning, the ambulance comes and takes Jimmy, the TV boy, and his parents who have gone crazy, all to the hospital.
Now the only sound heard at home is from Marina, who is still talking excitedly on phone.
-
I'll tell you the story of Jimmy Jet
And you know what I tell you is true.
He loved to watch his TV set
Almost as much as you.
-
He watched all day, he watched all night
Till he grew pale and lean,
From "The Early Show" to "The Late Late Show"
And all the shows between.
-
He watched till his eyes were frozen wide,
And his bottom grew into this chair,
And his chin turned into a turning dial,
And antennae grew out of his hair.
-
And his brain turned into TV tubes,
And his face to a TV screen.
And two knobs saying "VERT." and "HORIZ."
Grew where his ears had been.
-
And he grew a plug that looked like a tail
So we plugged in little Jim.
And now instead of him watching TV
We all sit around and watch him.
-
Jimmy Jet and His TV Set
BY Shel Silverstein
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